Monday, February 9, 2015


Relationships can be fickle, where finding contentment is hard in a sea of envious people. We have family, neighbours, and friends that we sometimes envy. There is no contentment in our being: in seeing that the others seemed to have a better life than our own --- wealthier, healthier, and happier.

We look at ourselves and take pity on how we are compared to them. When that arises, our morale takes a nose dive that could make us feel very small. What we do is put up a happy fa├žade to cover up an empty and lonely soul - like in the social media.

Several studies have shown that social media sites, like Facebook, may be harmful to our self worth.  There is always the need to compare our lives vis-a-vis our friends. What we do is post pictures of things that glorifies us in our normal lives.

The glorified selves would include ---eating in fine dining restaurants, owning expensive gadgets and electronic equipment, vacationing in and out of the country, and posting about anything that would show us in a good light.

Envy can lead to loneliness and lack of self worth
Photo credit: by Atranias

Is there something wrong with that?

Nope. Not particularly. It is intrinsic in human nature to only show the good side and hide what is bad. We assume that if we bombard the others with what is good, they may eventually believe it---especially if the tirades were made for a long time. But very few people can do that. Untruths have a way of rearing its ugly head when you least expect it.

Envy: Other Man's Grass Seemed Greener

I live in a neighbourhood with different persuasions. Most belongs to the working group and have businesses of their own. The big shots own motorcycle dealerships, chemical /industrial firms, are doctors or professionals, or  owners of upscale stores. The middle-of-the-roader owns retail outlets, have families who are OFW's, and/or have small family-owned businesses.

A few houses away, was a neighbour who was into the catering business. They owned delivery vehicles and were busy manning their different outlets in the metropolis. Since we don't cook most of the time, we rely on this neighbour for our instant food fare whenever we go hungry.

I admit, that I sometimes envy them, on how lucrative the business seemed to be. Neighbours appreciate their cooking and I see cars parked everywhere, to buy food before going to their respective offices. That went on for quite sometime, until I noticed that the selection of dishes was dwindling. The quality was not what it used to be. After sometime, we stopped patronizing the outlet as we would rather cook at home than buy from them.

A bowl of Pancit Luglog bought from nearby food stalls


This morning, I saw a man sweeping in the front yard. I also noticed that the yard was dirty and in a mess. Upon inquiry, I was told that the owners were no longer there since the bank foreclosed the propert a month ago.

All through that time, I envied this neighbour. How wealthy they seemed to be, with their business going strong. I never stop to think that they may be having problems of their own.

Envy is a bad trait. You never know what the other person is going through until you get into their shoes. It is always best to be contented with what you have and to never compare yourself with the others.



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